Sunday, November 11, 2012

Coffee with Nasser #6

            Nasser and I met for the sixth time today to get coffee at the bookstore. Our meeting was the third cup of coffee I have had today (and by third cup I mean what Americans consider a cup of coffee, not what a portion of coffee is); needless to say, I was a little chatty.

We started off talking about family sizes. Nasser has what Americans consider a large family; I think he said that both his father and mother are one of eight children, and Nasser has three brothers and four sisters. My mom is one of two and my dad is one of three; I only have seven first cousins. He understands why the average number of children is much lower in America; specifically, he mentioned the cost of putting one’s children through college. In Saudi Arabia, the universities pay people to attend. I then proceeded to explain the cost differences between public and private universities, and the general education system in America. He didn’t understand why one still has to pay to attend a public university; for that, I didn’t have an answer (or at least a good one), but I did explain that all public education up until college is free (well, it comes from tax dollars) and that made him feel a little better about the cost of our schools.

In relation to school, Nasser does not understand why Americans study English in school, more specifically in college, because we know how to speak it. I had to explain that our English classes are not focused on grammar like his classes, but instead on reading the massive volume of published works and learning to analyze, critique, and respond to it.

Next, Nasser asked for my email; he found some good Arabic jokes and had tried to send them to me, but couldn’t find my email address in his address book. I mentioned that today I read tales about Juha, and he became so excited! He was surprised to learn that our whole class is reading them, and he was ashamed that he forgot to mention Juha earlier when he told me about Arabic humor. He also asked what I had learned from my research on Arabic humor. As previously mentioned, I want people to pay attention to our presentation, so I will not discuss most of the specifics.

One aspect of Arabic humor that we spent a lot of time talking about is how cussing is off limits in their humor. This filled a lot of time because I had to explain what a cuss word is. I used a few words to explain that a cuss word is a word that once had an everyday, benign definition, but which has since been converted into something used in a derogatory way. I also described cuss words as “bad” words that should not be said. For this, I used the n-word as an example. After I finished explaining why it is so off-limits, he thanked me. He didn’t know that it was a bad word or the derogatory meaning behind it, but he said he has heard it many times. I found that very heartbreaking; a word as derogatory as that should not be used in conversation, yet he has been in America for a year and has heard it many times, never knowing that it is a bad word.

We also talked about the media, and how the Middle East is always portrayed in such a negative light: burning flags, burning buildings, and violent rioting, but that that only represents a couple thousand out of the billion or so Muslims in the world. He said that in the Middle East, in general, there are two groups of people: those who peacefully protest by just standing on the street holding signs or by boycotting products; then there are those who do not want to publicly respond because they recognize the way that the rest of the world sees the Middle East, and they do not want to further that stereotype. I understand that news is news and that it needs to be public knowledge, but why does news always have to be the bad stuff? Can’t people find good stuff informative and worth sharing? What is it about human nature that so attracts our curiosity? From this, we discussed the cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad that were printed in a Danish newspaper, but I will tell y’all more about that on Wednesday.

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